The Bribe-a-day Plan
June 27th, 2010
A major psychic challenge of cancer treatment comes down to your ability to answer the following question:
How do you continue to do something that makes you feel bad, knowing that it is good for you?
I felt great when I was diagnosed with cancer. I know that is not so for everybody. I was strong and healthy (sort of). This treatment has made me feel like crap. Nothing in my previous experience has taxed my ability to cope as much as this.
I’m in the homestretch now. Just five more radiation treatments left, and the last major event in the Triathlon from Hell will be complete.
The problem is that I am having difficulties being compliant. Every inch of my being wants to run away from that awful beam machine, even though I know it is helping to save my life.
As you can see, my skin is beet red. It’s Kentucky Fried. Thanks to the tech who did my echocardiogram this past Thursday, I also have a nice blister where the echo sticker removed a chunk of my skin. All pain emanates from The Evil Blister. It is the source of my current torture.
That white spot is The Evil Blister. I think it’s now yellow. Yuk.
Next week, I have five days of “electron boosts.” I had counted down my treatments last week, thinking I would be home free now that I was done with the big beam. Alas, when I met with my oncologist last Thursday and showed her my skin, she grimaced and warned me that the boosts would probably make my scar “really hurt.”
As opposed to the lightly tortured feeling I am experiencing now, I suppose.
I don’t wanna do it. But I know I have to. So my friends and I hatched a plan. I call it the Bribe-a-Day plan. Every day this week, I am going to treat myself to something nice. It will be my reward for showing up and finishing out my torture treatment. I will cash in some of the gift certificates my friends sent me for massages or facials. I will make long phone calls. I will linger in the bookstore, eat gelato, buy a lovely scented candle or a bouquet of flowers, and have my feet rubbed and toenails painted.
The genius of this plan is that it’s already working. I am looking forward to my daily treats, enough so that I will endure the blistering, burning, and peeling that will be part of the package.
This entry was posted on Sunday, June 27th, 2010 at 2:20 pm and is filed under Treatment. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Good Heaven’s! Can you keep a bottle of Goo Gone in your purse so they don’t have to rip those contacts off after your echo’s?
The first tech that removed the covering from my husbands port peeled off about an inch and a half of skin too. Grrrrr!
5 days. A work week. How many minutes spent in there? Think of how happy you will be when you are done. A week from now you wont have to see the radiation oncologist, just for check ups. Think of what it was like 5 days ago, you didn’t think you would finish it then either. 5 days. The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter.
A bribe a day is a fantastic idea!!!!!!!!!!
a bribe a day, brilliant! I didn’t do this, but saved mine up and splurged on a mini-vacation. I flew to FL on the last day of my radiation treatments to see a concert with a friend. So, daily, weekly…whatever the frequency it is very important to treat yourself during this process, you deserve it! Cancer treatment sucks, but it is still better than the alternative.